Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
