ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
