just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
