why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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