Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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