I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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