I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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