sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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