he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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