sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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