I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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