we have officially lost it.
So drunk its hurt
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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