spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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