The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Randomize
