party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
