that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
