I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just cut my nipple shaving
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
