as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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