I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
