I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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