I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
