Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
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