Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
