He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
