i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
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