It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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