best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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