That's intense
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
