If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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