You're so nebulous sometimes
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
honey bunches of taint.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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