did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
