Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
