And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize
