Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Randomize
