I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
