did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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