**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
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