its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Terrible idea I love it
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
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