I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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