$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Randomize
