u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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