I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Randomize