I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
