Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
