Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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