like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Randomize
