Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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