how can u be prego again
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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