just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
you made out with another girl for some wings
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
