Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
